Boot Camp Hawaii

Aloha! As a local small business owner, I'd like to introduce you to Boot Camp Hawaii. BCH is taking the next step toward helping women and men in Hawaii to get into the best shape of their lives! I am Emily Boll, owner of Boot Camp Hawaii. My focus for the next year is to promote our fitness and health services among local brides, grooms, family, and friends who want to challenge themselves to make a healthy visible change in their lives! Brides and grooms ultimately have a time frame in mind and that's to get fit and ready before their wedding day. I know this because I am a recent newlywed myself! During the engagement time together, most of people realize that their positive health changes will help them succeed further in maintaining their health beyond their wedding date. Also, everyone loves a little challenge and competition, right? I hope you can join in on our upcoming event! Please open the attachment for more details. Sincerely, Emily Boll "Be Healthy, Be Fit, Be Sassy!" Boot Camp Hawaii (808) 255-7714 bridalbootcamphawaii@yahoo.com URL: www.bridalbootcamphawaii.com

Kindness Trend

More and more couples right now are incorporating a charitable element into their big day – and it’s not just celebrities who are doing this. A wave of couples everywhere are making the choice to do something generous for a good cause as part of their wedding celebration.

Weddings have always had a self-indulgent element to them, and so it’s exciting to see couples generously opening their hearts to others on their wedding day. What a wonderful way to celebrate the love they share – by sprinkling some of that love out to others by doing good.

Kindness is contagious.

With any trend, the more people see of it, the more likely they are to adopt it. But a lot of people really feel inspired by the good deeds of others. It makes them want to do something good too. When you think about it, it’s a really beautiful way for a couple to start their new life together. You've got to admit, it’s got a good vibe to it.

We predict that the kindness trend will continue to pick up momentum over the next 12 months, but unlike other trends that fade completely after reaching their peak, the concept behind this one has some staying power. Trends, by their very nature, are flaky. One day everyone’s doing a particular thing, and before long it’s never seen again. But fortunately kindness never completely goes out of style. Chances are this current trend will show people how easily charitable elements can be incorporated into weddings, and those ideas will continue to be seen at weddings long after this is no longer the ‘it’ thing of the moment.

Once people try it they find that doing something kind for others actually feels amazingly good. And that makes them want to do more of it.

On a more personal note, frankly, I wish this trend had started back when I got married in ’92. I personally have a lot of concern for the well being of animals. Looking back, making a donation in each of my guest’s names to a no-kill shelter would have been more meaningful than all those pretty little wedding favors we gave away. Sure, the favors were gorgeous, but doing something to make a difference would have been an unbeatable feeling. Unfortunately, no one thought of doing this fifteen years ago.

So why this trend at this time? Here's our theory. In recent times, we’ve witnessed a lot of really harsh realities. September 11. America at war. The Tsunami. Then Katrina. As they spend all that money on a big one-day celebration for themselves, and revel in their own happiness, a lot of caring, socially conscious couples are trying to reconcile that with the suffering many others are experiencing in these times. There may be a little pang of guilt, or simply a genuine desire to share their blessings with others who are nowhere near as fortunate.

Today more and more couples use the details of their weddings to paint an intimate self-portrait of themselves. Through the many wedding-related selections they need to make - the decor, the food, the flower, the favors - they strive to make a statement about who they are so that their wedding day becomes a meaningful reflection of themselves. Certainly, making kindess a part of their weddings or including a philantrhopic element says something very special about a couple.

More and more couples everywhere are taking the opportunity to show kindness to others when they exchange their vows. You can do this too, and we highly encourage it! Make a charitable donation in the name of each of your guests in place of traditional wedding favors. Or ask guests to make a donation to the charity of your choice, or theirs, in place of wedding gifts. Sooner or later, kindness is always returned to you, ten fold. We promise!

Here are some ideas on how you can make kindness a part of your wedding:

* In place of traditional wedding favors, make a donation to a worthwhile cause in each guest’s name. At the reception, present each guest with a small nicely printed card explaining that this has been done.

* Suggest that instead of wedding gifts, guests make a contribution to either a charity of your choosing, or a cause that is important to them. Pop star Christina Aguilera did this when she wed last December and requested that guests make donations to Hurricane Katrina victims rather than giving wedding presents. Even comic strip characters are taking a shine to this trend; the popular comic strip character Cathy also did this last year when she asked her guests (and readers of the strip) to make a donation to a particular California shelter for homeless animals!

* Some gift registry services will donate a percentage of all gifts purchased through their service to the charity of your choice – look for one that offers this.

* Make arrangements to donate food left over from the reception to a local soup kitchen or homeless shelter.

* Donate flower arrangements to local hospices or nursing homes following the wedding.

* After the wedding, donate your used wedding supplies and accessories –or even your wedding dress - to Goodwill (Goodwill Industries International) or another charitable organization that collects used goods.

Quote of the Day!

Blessing for a Marriage
by James Dillet Freeman

May your marriage bring you all the exquisite
excitement marriage should bring,
and may life grant you also patience,
tolerance, and understanding.

May you always need one another -
not so much to fill your emptiness
as to help you to know your fullness.
A mountain needs a valley to be complete;
the valley does not make
the mountain less, but more;
and the valley is more a valley because
it has a mountain towering over it.

May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
May you want one another, but not out of lack.
May you entice one another, but not compel one another.
May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
May you succeed in all important ways with one another,
and not fail in the little graces.
May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you!"
and take no notice of small faults.

If you have quarrels that push you apart,
may both of you hope to have
good sense enough to take the first step back.

May you enter into the mystery which is
the awareness of one another's
presence - no more physical than spiritual,
warm and near when you are
side by side, and warm and near when
you are in separate rooms
or even distant cities.

May you have happiness,
and may you find it making one another happy.
May you have love, and may you find it loving one another.

Happy Halloween

Quote (poem) of the Day!

That I did always love,

I bring thee proof:

That till I loved

I did not love enough.

That I shall love always,

I offer thee

That love is life,

And life hath immortality.

This, dost that doubt, sweet?

Then have I

Nothing to show

But Calvary.

Emily Dickensen

Silence That Isn’t Golden

Silence That Isn’t Golden

Originally Posted on October 21st, 2009 Richard Himmer

Some years ago my wife, Cheri and I had dinner with some friends at a little Mexican restaurant in the Proctor district in Tacoma. The food was sumptuous and my chimichanga was absolutely amazing especially considering it was fat free, at least until I ate it.

It was a blustery evening outside so after dinner we snuggled up to a fireplace conversation. It was rather mundane actually, that is until Gertie expressed some strong opinions on a political subject.

What a perfect evening this was turning out to be, a dinner and a conflict. Gertie’s strong words did not harmonize with my view and I felt excited at the potential conflict brewing in the room.

Let me interrupt my narrative for a semantic identification moment. First of all the purpose of communicating is to exchange understanding. Trying to get someone to agree with you is manipulative and contentious.

Secondly, we often confuse conflict and contention so here is my take on the two words.

Conflict is friction. It is not agreeing on the methodology but having the same goal. Conflict is to be resolved and is necessary for growth, especially within a relationship. Weight lifting is conflict to your muscles. Conflict resolution is searching for understanding at the expense of personal opinion. It is what is right and not who is right.

Contention is evil and the absence of progress. It is making conflict personal. It is not topic related but carries the intent to harm with no desire to learn. Contention is searching for agreement versus exchanging understanding. Contention is who is right at the expense of what is right.

As I commenced questioning Gertie about her point of view, she became defensive. There is no doubt my questioning skills could improve, but before I could even express a difference of opinion, we quickly went from conflict straight into contention and the conversation was over.

What happened was written all over my freckled face. The subject was changed, the air was thick, and the evening quickly turned cool. Within 15 minutes we were driving home discussing what I did wrong (because it’s usually my fault.)

I’ve had years to consider this and many other similar events in my life. It seems my questions often get things out of sorts with other folks’ perceived harmony. Why?

That’s because of the confusion associated with conflict and contention. Conflict means there is communication and progress going on. How much exchanging is being transmitted when there is a wall of silence betwixt you and the other person?

Silence isn’t golden. Silence is contention and inhibits progress. Remember the next time you lose your cookies at someone or feel offended, elongated silence damages you much more than the perceived damage of your silence does to the other.

The only exception to this rule is a parent to the child. Parental silence is more than contention, it’s abuse and childish. Grow up and learn to communicate.

Quote of the Day!

"A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother why the bride changed her mind. What do you mean? responded her mother. Well, she went down the aisle with one man, and came back with another."

Source Unknown

Decorating trends

Wendy Balidoy of Spinning W.E.B. Florist, www.spinningwebflorist.com, offers ideas on decorating:

Well...there are alot of new trends that we are seeing, and of course, everyone wants the most bang for their buck.

Black seems to be BIG.....black rocks lining pathways...black chandeliers suspended above, black vases, black accents in bouquets.... and feathers, lots of feathers! Peacock feathers, which look fantastic with black accents are in demand. White ostrich plumes are also very popular.

Brides are looking for options rather than the "rose", we found that green cymbidiums were in for the past two years...but this year and for next year..its calla lilies!

Large vase rentals are very popular, especially for our destination brides who want "the look" but

do not want the hassle of lugging them home.... These large vases can be a dual purpose expense. They can line the isle to the alter, and be quickly moved to the guest tables during the reception or couple's cocktail hour.

Flowers, Baubles & Beads

Flowers, Baubles & Beads

Floral arrangements have come along way, and now can include feathers, beads, rhinestones and other "bling" that adds texture and color.

Terrie Easley, of Terrie Easley Designs www.easleydesigns.com, shares some of the trends she's seeing:

No matter the circumstances, weddings still are visions that a Bride and Groom have had for years as to what that special day will be like when it becomes a reality. Especially the Bride! It must be her dream day from the beginning to the end with the groom’s favorite part being…”the ultimate honeymoon.” When there is a budget established, it is sometimes altered when an idea is introduced that seems to “just be too good to pass up”.

There are so many new items on the wedding market. The wristlet bands are with beads, crystals, pearls, and rhinestones. The boutonnieres have pewter, or metal holders as does the bouquet holders. New types of ribbons, new arbors and arches made of bamboo or willow are choices of many couples getting married outdoors.

Being in business for 30 some years, I can honestly say that though there are newer trends, the old traditional with just a touch of new ideas is still the choice of most couples when it comes to floral designs. It comes full circle as most things do.

Wendy Balidoy of Spinning W.E.B. Florist, www.spinningwebflorist.com, offers more details:

Well...there are alot of new trends that we are seeing, and of course, everyone wants the most bang for their buck.

Black seems to be BIG.....black rocks lining pathways...black chandeliers suspended above, black vases, black accents in bouquets.... and feathers, lots of feathers! Peacock feathers, which look fantastic with black accents are in demand. White ostrich plumes are also very popular.

Brides are looking for options rather than the "rose", we found that green cymbidiums were in for the past two years...but this year and for next year..its calla lilies!

Large vase rentals are very popular, especially for our destination brides who want "the look" but

do not want the hassle of lugging them home.... These large vases can be a dual purpose expense. They can line the isle to the alter, and be quickly moved to the guest tables during the reception or couple's cocktail hour.

Quote of the Day

"One of the first things a relationship therapist learns is that couples argue to burn up energy that could be used for something else. In fact, arguments often serve the purpose of using up energy, so that the couple do not have to take the courageous, creative leap into an unknown they fear. Arguing serves the function of being a zone of familiarity into which you can retreat when you are afraid of making a creative breakthrough."

Gay Hendricks

Quote of the Day

"Marriage is not a noun; it's a verb. It isn't something you get. It's something you do. It's the way you love your partner every day."

Barbara De Angelis

Common Bride Mistakes

According to a recent survey of wedding professionals brides tend to make the same mistakes over and over: Here is a list of their responses~

1. They rely on too many opinions....too much input!

2. They have unrealistic expectations

3. They don't hire wedding professionals...they try to cut cost by having friends or family help out. This causes chaos and stress.

4. They don't create or use a good timeline/checklist

5. They don't read the contracts provided by wedding professionals

6. They don't realize the ceremony is for the bride but the reception is for the parents/guests

7. They don't find out what flowers are in season

8. They don't have 1 point person to fall back on, or run interference for the bride on the wedding day!

Marriage Quote of the Day

Ogden Nash:

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you're wrong admit it;
Whenever you're right shut up.

Marriage Quote of the Day!

"The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the ballroom or church or synagogue. It's a choice you make -- not just on your wedding day, but over and over again -- and that choice is reflected in the way you treat your husband or wife."

Barbara De Angelis
American Expert on Relationship & Love, Author

Bridal Show Experiences...

Here is a letter we received regarding the Expo in Hawaii in July 2009:

I just attended your wedding expo last weekend - there were eight of us that flew in to attend the expo to prepare for my daughter's wedding in May 2010.

It was such a wonderful event, I asked a vendor for a contact address so I could email and tell you how much we appreciated the expo. What fantastic vendors, so generous with their time and expertise. We came away with brochures and business cards and so many marvelous ideas and options.

We spent several hours there. We particularly liked the models in wedding dresses that circled during the expo. It was so helpful to be able to see each dress up close and touch the fabrics and ask the models to turn, etc. You just can't do that with a runway show. Also, the models were wonderfully patient with us. This actually helped us determine the designer and style for my daughter's wedding dress.

The sample wedding table settings and wedding decoration vendors were also very helpful in planning a theme for the wedding - again wonderful displays and very professional vendors. Even though we do not reside locally, we made contacts we'll be using for the wedding here at our location.

Again, thank you so much for a wonderful event. I just had to write and say I think everyone did an amazing job!

An appreciative mom,
Daria

Secret Tips and Tricks to a Happy Marriage

Secret Tips and Tricks to a Happy Marriage

Posted by: Richard Himmer

Why are those words so alluring?

The most successful couples seldom read articles with those words in the title. Such articles are for couples who are either struggling or do not comprehend that a successful marriage cannot be obtained with a few tricks.

There are no secret tips. There are no magic tricks. A happy marriage starts with love and ends with intimacy. The catalyst to making it work is the ability to develop trust. It’s the accumulation of good habits overriding the bad habits you developed before marriage.

You can’t read a book and think that your frustrations with your marriage will disappear. Without skill development your willingness and knowledge will be subject to trial and error. Skill development usually comes in the form of coaching and being held accountable.

Trial and error works but are you willing to pay the price when available systems can eliminate the cost and heartache associated with the self-help approach?

Most couples, when interviewed, want wealth and happiness and they spend years of time and thousands of dollars getting an education so they can become wealthy. But, how much time, energy, and money is spent to become happy?

One out of two marriages end in divorce. That means if you and your friend are getting married this year, one of you won’t make it longer than five years. In other words, the odds are 50% that you won’t be happy and that will have a huge impact upon your wealth.

We think there is a solution.

Balanced Living from the Start, Coaches, Communication Happy Marriage, Tips and Tricks, Wealth and Happiness

Puppy Dogs and Men

Puppy Dogs and Men

2009 Richard Himmer

During a conversation with my wife the other day, Cheri commented that men are just like puppy dogs. Since I’m not fully comfortable being compared to the four-legged animal kingdom, I asked for clarification. She smiled and explained: “Dogs are pleasers. They want their masters to be happy.”

She’s right. I am a pleaser. I don’t like it when my wife is angry with me. I want to make her happy and I don’t like the doghouse. I prefer my wife’s bed, just like my dog.

When we (husband and wife) take the time to talk about important items, we discover we both want the same things. What doesn’t make sense is how often a husband or a wife will act in such a way that elicits the exact opposite reaction needed to accomplish the goal.

This is called collusion. The art of doing the exact opposite of what I want.

We have found the best way to avoid collusion is by having a BOD meeting. The next time you find yourself in collusion with your spouse or child or anyone,

STOP, DROP, and ROLL.

Stop what you are doing. (Discontinue the fight, the discussion, the dialogue.)

Drop your argument completely. (No excuses, no explanations, no blaming.)

Roll the discussion into a BOD meeting to protect yourself from making matters worse. (Put the topic on your agenda and handle it in such a way that gives you the highest probability of working out a win/win scenario.)

10 tips for managing Wedding Stress

10 tips for managing Wedding Stress
1. Expect Stress: Try to plan and then respond to issues as they
 come up. If you have planned, you will be less likely to react instead of respond.
2. Set realistic expectations: You cannot please everyone!
3. Don't expect perfection! Expect a "terrific" day...
4. Try meditation or visualization if you are feeling particular
 pressure or stress about an event or element of your wedding
5. Take a walk! Exercise is the best way to combat stress.
6. You know those people who are really good at pushing your
 buttons? Limit your time with them, or stay away from them
during extremely stressful times.
7. Take a break and do something fun together if you and
your fiancé reach your stress threshold.
8. Be aware that if your parents are acting a little strange
 it could be "separation anxiety". It can be hard to let go.
9. Do not try to do everything yourself. Delegate to people
you can trust.
10. Don't forget to spend extra time on your relationship during the
planning process.  
Planning the wedding is important, of course, but it is a minute

 compared to the lifetime you will be together.

Lobby Booths at the Tacoma Fall Wedding Expo

Here are some companies you will see in the lobby at the Tacoma Wedding Expo on September 12 and 13th.

Lobby hours begin at 9:30...1/2 hour before main floor opens:

J & J Photography http://www.jenandjody.com

Wine and Roses Country Estate http://www.wineandrosescountryestate.com/

Leu Jam Productions http://www.leujam.com

Celebrity Cake Studios http://www.celebritycakestudio.com

Events With Integrity http://www.ewihome.com

Studio 6 http://www.studio6now.com

Men's Wearhouse http://www.menswearhouse.com

Carlson Wagonlit Travel http://www.travelcenter4u.com

Weddings With Joy http://www.weddingswithjoy.com

David's Bridal blog

Hi,

A bride deserves to have all of her wedding day dreams come true, but finding the perfect wedding dress and complimenting accessories can be stressful! To ensure a stunning and carefree walk down the aisle, Angelique Serrano, Latina magazine Fashion and Beauty Director and David’s Bridal Style Council member, is sharing her expert advice on how to pick the right dress for every body type and accessorize it with all the right touches.

Angelique has an exclusive video podcast live on the David’s Bridal blog, www.blogs.davidsbridal.com, that makes finding a gorgeous wedding day look easier and more affordable than ever! From beautiful hues and figure-flattering styles to veils and heavenly headpieces, Angelique will show brides-to-be how to stylishly weave all the key elements together. Closely monitoring the fashion industry for Latina and as the former Director for the New York Fashion and Beauty Center, Angelique is always in the know about the latest fashion trends.

If this is something that you or your readers may be interested in, please check out the blog or visit You Tube to view Angelique’s podcast.Please let me know if you’d like any additional information on the David’s Bridal Style Council or Angelique Serrano.

Thanks!

Best,
Catherine